Rule 4

Rule 4. If you would bear the loss of your dear relations with moderation, fix your eyes on God throughout the whole process of the affliction, and less on secondary causes and circumstances.

Psalm 39:9: I was dumb, I opened not my mouth, because you did it. Consider the hand of the Lord in the whole matter — and consider it as:

First, a sovereign hand, which has right to dispose of you and all your comforts without your leave or consent (Job 33:13).

Second, a Father's hand correcting you in love and faithfulness. Proverbs 3:11: Whom the Lord loves he corrects, as a father the son in whom he delights. O if you could but see affliction as a rod in a Father's hand, proceeding from his love and intended for your eternal good — how quiet you would be!

And surely if affliction draws your heart nearer to God and mortifies it more to this vain world, it is a rod in the hand of special love. If it ends in your love for God, do not doubt that it comes from God's love for you.

Third, a just and righteous hand. Have you not brought this upon yourself by your own folly? Yes, the Lord is just in all that has come upon you. Whatever he has done, he has done you no wrong.

Fourth and lastly, a moderate and merciful hand that has punished you less than your iniquities deserve. He has cast you into affliction; he might justly have cast you into hell. It is of the Lord's mercy that you are not consumed. Why does a living person complain?