Section 20

20. A godly man is good in his Relations: To be good in general is not enough, but we must show forth Piety in our Relations.

1. He is godly who is good as a Magistrate: The Magistrate is God's Representative; a godly Magistrate holds the balance of Justice, and gives to every one his right, Deuteronomy 16. 19. You shall not respect persons, neither take a gift, for a gift does blind the eyes. A Magistrate must judge the Cause, not the person: He who suffers himself to be corrupted with bribes, is not a Judge, but a Party: A Magistrate must do that which is according to Law, Acts 23. 3. And that he may do Justice, he must examine the Cause: The Archer that will shoot right, must first see the mark.

2. He is godly who is good as a Minister. A Minister must be

1. Painful, 2 Timothy 4. 1, 2. Preach the Word, be instant in season, out of season. The Minister must not be idle; sloth is as inexcusable in a Minister, as sleep in a Sentinel: John Baptist was a voice crying, Matthew 3. 3. A dumb Minister is of no more use than a dead Physician: A man of God must work in the Lord's Vineyard: It was Augustine's wish, that Christ might find him at his coming, either praying or preaching.

2. A Minister must be knowing, Malachi 2. 7. The Priests lips should keep knowledge, and they should seek the Law at his mouth. It was said in the honour of Nazianzene, that he was an Ocean of Divinity. The Prophets of old were called Seers, 1 Samuel 9. 9. It is absurd to have our Seers blind: Christ said to Peter, Feed my sheep, John 21. 16. But how sad is it when the Shepherds need to be fed? Ignorance in a Minister, is like blindness in an Oculist. Under the Law, he who had the plague in his head was unclean, Leviticus 13. 44.

3. A Minister must preach plain, suiting his matter and style to the capacity of his Auditory, 1 Corinthians 14. 19. Some Ministers, like Eagles, love to soar aloft in abstruse Metaphysical notions; thinking they are most admired, when they are least understood; they who preach in the Clouds, instead of hitting their people's Conscience, shoot over their heads.

4. A Minister must be zealous in reproving sin, Titus 1. 13. Rebuke them sharply. Epiphanius says of Eliah, he sucked fire out of his Mother's breasts; a man of God must suck the fire of zeal, out of the breasts of Scripture. Zeal in a Minister, is as proper as fire on the Altar; some are afraid to reprove; like the Sword-fish, which has a sword in his head, but is without an heart; so they carry the sword of the spirit about them, but have no heart to draw it out in a reproof against sin; how many have sown pillows under their people, making them sleep so securely, that they have never waked, till they have been in hell.

5. A Minister must be holy in heart and life.

1. In heart. How sad is it for a Minister, to preach that to others, which he never felt in his own soul; to exhort others to holiness, and himself a stranger to it: O that it were not thus too often! How many blow the Lord's Trumpet with a foul breath.

2. In Life. The Priests under the Law, before they served at the Altar, washed in the Laver; such as serve in the Lord's house, must first be washed from gross sin, in the Laver of repentance: The life of a Minister should be a walking Bible. Basil said of Nazianzene, he did thunder in his doctrine, and lighten in his conversation: A Minister must imitate John Baptist, who was not only a voice crying, Isaiah 40. 3. but a light shining, John 5. 35. They disgrace this excellent calling, who live in a contradiction to what they preach; they turn their codices into calices, their books into cups, and though they are Angels by office, yet are Devils in their lives, Jeremiah 23. 15.

3. He is godly, who is good as an Husband, he fills up that relation with love, Ephesians 5. 25. Husbands love your Wives: The Vine twisting its branches about the Elm, and embracing it, may be an emblem of that entire love, which should be in the conjugal relation; a married condition would be sad, if it has cares to embitter it, and not love to sweeten it: Love is the best diamond in the marriage Ring: Isaac loved Rebekah, Genesis 24. 57. Unkindnesses in this near relation, are very unhappy. We read in Heathen Authors, that Clitemnestra the wife of Agamemnon, to revenge an injury received from her Husband, first rent the Veil of her chastity, and afterwards consented to his death: The Husband should show his love to his Wife, by covering infirmities, by avoiding occasions of strife, by sweet endearing expressions, by pious counsel, by love-tokens, by encouraging what he sees amiable and virtuous in her, by mutual prayer, by associating with her, unless detained by urgency of business: The Pilot that goes from his ship, and quite leaves it to the merciless waves, declares that he does not esteem it, or reckon any treasure to be in it.

The Apostle gives a good reason, why there should be mutual love between Husband and Wife, 1 Peter 3. 7. That your prayers be not hindered: where passions prevail, there prayer is either intermitted, or interrupted.

4. He is godly who is good, as a Father.

1. A Father must drop holy instructions into his Children, Ephesians 6. 4. Bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord: Thus did Abraham, Genesis 18. 19. I know Abraham, that he will command his children, and his household, and they shall keep the way of the Lord. Children are young plants, which must be watered with good education, that they may with Obadiah, fear the Lord from their youth up, 1 Kings 18. 12. Plato says, in vain does he expect an harvest, who has been negligent in sowing; nor can a parent look to reap any good from a child, where he has not sown the seed of wholesome instruction; and though notwithstanding all counsel and admonition, the child should die in sin, yet it is a comfort to a godly Parent, to think that before his child died, he gave it spiritual physic.

2. A parent must pray for his Children: Monica the Mother of Augustine, prayed for his Conversion, and one said, It was impossible a Son of so many Prayers and Tears should miscarry: The soul of your Child is in a snare, and will not you pray that it may be recovered out of the snare of the Devil, 2 Timothy 2. 26. Many Parents are careful to lay up portions for their children, but they do not lay up prayers for them.

3. A Parent must give his children discipline, Proverbs 23. 13. Withhold not correction from the child, for if you beat him with the rod, he shall not die: The rod beats out the dust and moth of sin; a child indulged and humoured in wickedness, will prove a burden instead of a blessing: David cockered Adonijah, 1 Kings 1. 6. His Father had not displeased him at any time, saying, why have you done so? and he afterwards was a grief of heart to his Father, and would have put him besides his throne; correction is a hedge of thorns, to stop Children in their full Career to hell.

5. He is godly who is good, as a Master; a godly man promotes religion in his family; he sets up piety in his house, as well as in his heart, Psalm 101. 2. I will walk within my house with a perfect heart, Joshua 24. 15. I, and my household will serve the Lord. I find it written in the honor of Cranmer, his Family was Palaestra Pietatis, a Nursery of Piety: A godly man's house is a little Church, Colossians 4. 15. The Church which is in his house.

1. A good man makes known the Oracles of God to them, who are under his roof; he reads the Word, perfumes his house with prayer: It is recorded of the Jews, that they had sacrifices in their Family, as well as in the Tabernacle, Exodus 12. 3.

2. A godly man provides necessaries; he relieves his servants in health and Sickness; he is not like that Amalakite, who shook off his servant when he was sick, 1 Samuel 30. 13. But rather like the good Centurion, who sought to Christ for the healing of his sick servant, Matthew 8. 5.

3. A godly man sets his servants a good example, he is sober and heavenly in his deportment, his virtuous life is a fair glass for the servants in the family to dress themselves by.

6. He is godly who is good in the Relation of a Child, He honours his parents. Philo the Jew, placed the fifth Commandment in the first Table; as if Children had not performed their whole devotion to God, till they had given honour to their Parents. This honouring of Parents consists in two things.

1. In reverencing their persons; which reverence is shown both by humility of speech and gesture: The contrary to this is, when a Child does behave himself unseemly and proudly. Among the Lacedemonians, if a Child had carried himself imperiously towards his parent, it was published by Authority, that it was lawful for the Father to appoint whom he would to be his Heir, and to disinherit that Child.

2. Honoring of Parents lies in obeying their Commands, Ephesians 6. 1. Children obey your Parents in the Lord. Duty is the Interest money which children pay their Parents, for the Principal they have had from them. Christ has set all Children a pattern of obedience to their Parents, Luke 2. 51. He was subject unto them. The Rechabites were eminent for this, Jeremiah 35. 5. I set before the Rechabites pots full of wine, and said to them drink wine, but they said we will drink no wine, for Jonadab the son of Rechab our Father commanded us saying, You shall drink no wine, neither you, nor your sons for ever. Solon among the many Laws he made, one asked him, Why he made no Law against disobedient Children; he answered, because he thought none would be so wicked. God has punished Children, who have refused to pay the tribute of obedience. Absalom, a disobedient son, was hanged in an Oak betwixt Heaven and Earth, as being worthy of neither. Manlius, an old man, being reduced to much poverty, and having a rich son, he entreated him only for an alms, but could not obtain it; the son disowned him as his Father, and gave him reproachful language; the poor old man let tears fall (as witnesses of his grief) and went away; God to revenge this disobedience of the son, soon after struck him with frenzy; he in whose heart godliness lives, makes as well Conscience of the fifth Commandment as the first.

6. He is godly who is good as a servant, Colossians 3. 22. Ephesians 6. 5. Servants be subject to them who are your Masters, according to the flesh, with fear and trembling. The goodness of servants lies

1. In diligence: Abraham's servant made haste to dispatch the business his Master intrusted him with, Genesis 24. 33.

2. Cheerfulness: Servants must be Free-willers: Thus the Centurion's servants, Luke 7. 8. If I say to one go, he goes.

3. Faithfulness; which consists in two things: 1. In not defrauding, Titus 2. 10. Not purloining. 2. In keeping counsel; it argues the badness of a stomach, when it cannot retain what is put into it; and the badness of a servant, when he cannot retain those secrets which his Master has committed to him.

4. Silentness, Titus 2. 9. Not answering again. It is better to mend a fault, than to mince it; and that which may quicken a servant in his work, is that encouraging Scripture, Colossians 3. 24, Knowing that of the Lord you shall receive the reward of the Inheritance, for you serve the Lord Christ. If Christ should bid you do a piece of work for him, would you not do it? While you serve your Master, you serve the Lord Christ: If you ask what Salary you shall have, You shall receive the reward of the Inheritance.

Use 1. Is this the Grand Sign of a godly man, to be relatively holy? Then the Lord be merciful to us, how few godly ones are to be found? Many put on the Coat of Profession, they will pray, and discourse of points of Religion, but what means the bleating of the sheep? They are not good in their Relations. How ill does it sound when Christians are defective in Relative Piety. Can we call him godly who is a bad Magistrate? He perverts equity, Psalm 58:1. Do you judge uprightly, O you sons of men? You weigh the violence of your hands in the earth. Can we call him godly, who is a bad Parent? He never teaches his Child the way to heaven. He is like the Ostrich, which is cruel to her young, Job 39:19. Can we call him godly who is a bad Master? Many Masters leave their Religion at Church, (as the Clerk does his book) they have nothing of God at home, their houses are not Bethels, but Bethavens; not little Temples, but little Hells. How many Masters at the last day must hold up their hand at the Bar, though they have fed their servants' bellies, they have starved their souls. Can we call him godly, who is a bad Child? He stops his ear to his Parents' counsel; you may as well call him a good subject who is disloyal. Can we call him godly, who is a bad servant? He is slothful and willful; he is more ready to spy a fault in another, than to mend it in himself. To call one godly, who is bad in his Relations, is a contradiction, it is to call evil good, Isaiah 5:20.

Use 2. As we desire to have God approve us, let us show forth godliness in our Relations. Not to be good in our relations, spoils all our other good things. Naaman was an honourable man, but he was a Leper, 2 Kings 5:1. That But, spoiled all; so such an one is a great hearer, but he neglects relative duties, this stains the beauty of all his other actions. As in Printing, though the Letter be never so well carved, yet if it be not set in the right place, it spoils the sense; so let a man have many things commendable in him, yet if he be not good in his right place, making conscience how he walks in his relations, he does hurt to religion. There are many, to whom Christ will say at last, as to the young man, Luke 18:22. Unum deest, yet you lack one thing, you have miscarried in your relative capacity. As therefore we tender our salvation, and the honour of religion, let us shine forth in that Orb of relation, where God has fixed us.

20. A godly man is godly in his relationships. It is not enough to be good in a general way — we must show our godliness in the roles and relationships we occupy.

1. A person is godly who is good as a magistrate or civil official. The magistrate is God's representative. A godly magistrate holds the balance of justice and gives every person what is rightly theirs. Deuteronomy 16:19: You shall not pervert justice. You shall not show partiality, and you shall not accept a bribe, for a bribe blinds the eyes of the wise. A magistrate must judge the case, not the person. A judge who allows himself to be corrupted by bribes is no longer a judge but a party to the crime. A magistrate must act according to the law, as Acts 23:3 says. And to do justice, he must first examine the case carefully. An archer who wants to shoot straight must first see the target clearly.

2. A person is godly who is good as a minister. A minister must be —

First, diligent. 2 Timothy 4:1-2: Preach the word; be ready in season and out of season. A minister must not be idle. Laziness in a minister is as inexcusable as sleeping at one's post. John the Baptist was a voice crying out, as Matthew 3:3 says. A silent minister is no more useful than a dead physician. A man of God must labor in the Lord's vineyard. It was Augustine's prayer that Christ might find him either praying or preaching when He came.

Second, a minister must be knowledgeable. Malachi 2:7: For the lips of a priest should guard knowledge, and people should seek instruction from his mouth. It was said of Gregory Nazianzene that he was an ocean of theology. The prophets of old were called seers, as 1 Samuel 9:9 notes. It is absurd to have our seers be blind. Christ said to Peter: Feed My sheep, as John 21:16 records. How sad it is when the shepherds themselves need to be fed. Ignorance in a minister is like blindness in an eye doctor. Under the law, a person with a diseased head was declared unclean, as Leviticus 13:44 states.

Third, a minister must preach plainly, adapting his content and style to the understanding of his congregation. 1 Corinthians 14:19. Some ministers, like eagles, love to soar into abstract theological speculations, thinking they are most admired when they are least understood. Those who preach in the clouds, rather than reaching their people's conscience, simply shoot over their heads.

Fourth, a minister must be zealous in rebuking sin. Titus 1:13: Rebuke them sharply. Epiphanius said of Elijah that he had sucked fire from his mother's breast. A man of God must draw the fire of zeal from the breast of Scripture. Zeal in a minister is as appropriate as fire on the altar. Some are afraid to rebuke — like the swordfish, which carries a sword on its head but has no heart to use it. They carry the sword of the Spirit but have no will to draw it in reproof against sin. Many have spread comfort over their people like a soft pillow, letting them sleep so soundly that they never woke until they were in hell.

Fifth, a minister must be holy in heart and life.

First, in heart. How tragic it is for a minister to preach to others what he has never experienced in his own soul — to urge others toward holiness while being a stranger to it himself. Would that this were not so common. How many blow the Lord's trumpet with an unclean breath.

Second, in life. Under the law, the priests washed themselves in the basin before serving at the altar. Those who serve in the Lord's house must first be washed from gross sin in the basin of repentance. The life of a minister should be a walking Bible. Basil said of Gregory Nazianzene that he thundered in his preaching and shone in his conduct. A minister must imitate John the Baptist, who was not only a voice crying out, as Isaiah 40:3 says, but also a light shining, as John 5:35 says. Those who live in contradiction to what they preach bring disgrace on a noble calling. They turn their books into cups and their study into a tavern. Though they are angels in office, they are devils in their lives. Jeremiah 23:15.

3. A person is godly who is good as a husband — who fills that role with love. Ephesians 5:25: Husbands, love your wives. The vine twining its branches around the elm and embracing it is a picture of the deep love that should characterize marriage. Marriage would be a sorrowful condition if it had only cares to make it bitter without love to make it sweet. Love is the finest diamond in the wedding ring. Isaac loved Rebekah, as Genesis 24:67 says. Unkindness in this close relationship causes great harm. Pagan writers record that Clytemnestra, the wife of Agamemnon, in revenge for wrongs she suffered from her husband, first broke the bonds of fidelity and then agreed to his murder. A husband should show his love for his wife by covering her weaknesses, by avoiding occasions of conflict, by tender and affirming words, by godly counsel, by gifts and expressions of love, by encouraging what he sees that is admirable and virtuous in her, by praying together, and by spending time with her — unless prevented by urgent business. A pilot who abandons his ship and leaves it to the mercy of the waves shows that he does not value it or think there is anything worth protecting in it.

The apostle gives a strong reason why husband and wife should love each other. 1 Peter 3:7: So that your prayers may not be hindered. Where strong passions dominate, prayer is either neglected or disrupted.

4. A person is godly who is good as a father.

First, a father must pour godly instruction into his children. Ephesians 6:4: Bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord. This is what Abraham did. Genesis 18:19: I have chosen him, that he may command his children and his household after him to keep the way of the Lord. Children are young plants that must be watered with good education so that they may, like Obadiah, fear the Lord from their youth, as 1 Kings 18:12 says. Plato observed that the person who neglects to sow cannot expect to harvest. In the same way, a parent who neglects to sow the seed of sound instruction cannot expect good fruit from a child. And even if the child dies in sin despite all counsel, it is still a comfort to a godly parent to know that before the child died, he gave him the medicine of spiritual truth.

Second, a parent must pray for his children. Monica, the mother of Augustine, prayed earnestly for his conversion. Someone said of Augustine: It was impossible that a son of so many prayers and tears should be lost. Your child's soul is in a trap — will you not pray that it may be delivered from the snare of the devil? 2 Timothy 2:26. Many parents are careful to set aside an inheritance for their children but never set aside prayers for them.

Third, a parent must discipline his children. Proverbs 23:13: Do not withhold discipline from a child; if you strike him with a rod, he will not die. Discipline beats out the dust and moth of sin. A child indulged and allowed to pursue wickedness will become a burden rather than a blessing. David coddled Adonijah. 1 Kings 1:6: His father had never at any time displeased him by asking, Why have you done thus? Adonijah later became a grief to his father and tried to seize his throne. Correction is a hedge of thorns that stops children before they sprint all the way to hell.

5. A person is godly who is good as a head of household. A godly man promotes religion in his family — he establishes worship in his home, not only in his heart. Psalm 101:2: I will walk within my house with a blameless heart. Joshua 24:15: As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord. It is recorded in honor of Archbishop Cranmer that his household was a nursery of godliness. A godly man's home is a small church. Colossians 4:15: The church in his house.

First, a godly head of household makes God's word known to those under his roof. He reads Scripture, and fills his house with the fragrance of prayer. The Jews had acts of worship in their households as well as in the tabernacle, as Exodus 12:3 records.

Second, a godly master provides for his servants' needs. He cares for them in health and in sickness. He is not like the Amalekite in 1 Samuel 30:13, who abandoned his servant when he fell ill. He is rather like the good centurion, who came to Christ on behalf of his sick servant, as Matthew 8:5 records.

Third, a godly master sets his servants a good example. He is sober and heavenly in his manner. His virtuous life is a clear mirror in which everyone in his household can see how to conduct themselves.

6. A person is godly who is good in the role of a child — who honors his parents. Philo the Jew placed the fifth commandment in the first table of the law, as if children had not completed their duty to God until they had also given honor to their parents. Honoring parents involves two things.

First, showing respect for their persons — respect that is shown both in humble speech and in humble manner. The opposite is a child who behaves toward a parent with arrogance and contempt. Among the Lacedemonians, if a child behaved disrespectfully toward a parent, it was publicly declared that the father was lawfully permitted to disinherit that child and choose another heir.

Second, honoring parents means obeying their instructions. Ephesians 6:1: Children, obey your parents in the Lord. Obedience is the interest children pay their parents on the investment their parents have made in them. Christ set every child an example of obedience to parents. Luke 2:51: He was submissive to them. The Rechabites were outstanding in this. Jeremiah 35:5-6: I set before the Rechabites pitchers of wine and said, Drink wine — but they said, We will drink no wine, for Jonadab the son of Rechab, our father, commanded us saying: You shall not drink wine, you or your sons, forever. When Solon was asked why he had not made a law against disobedient children, he answered that he thought no one could be so wicked. God has punished children who refused to pay the tribute of obedience. Absalom, a disobedient son, was hanged in an oak tree between heaven and earth, as being worthy of neither. Manlius, an old man reduced to poverty, had a wealthy son. He asked his son only for a small gift, but could not receive it. The son disowned him and spoke to him with contempt. The old man walked away with tears falling as witnesses to his grief. God, to avenge this disobedience, soon struck the son with madness. The person in whom godliness truly lives makes as much conscience of the fifth commandment as the first.

7. A person is godly who is good in the role of a servant. Colossians 3:22; Ephesians 6:5: Servants, obey your earthly masters with fear and trembling. The faithfulness of a servant shows in —

First, diligence. Abraham's servant made haste to complete the task his master had given him, as Genesis 24:33 shows.

Second, cheerfulness. Servants must serve willingly. As the centurion described his servants in Luke 7:8: I say to one, Go, and he goes.

Third, faithfulness, which has two parts. First, not taking what does not belong to you. Titus 2:10: Not pilfering. Second, keeping confidences. A stomach that cannot hold what is put into it is a poor stomach — and a servant who cannot keep the secrets his master has entrusted to him is a poor servant.

Fourth, not talking back. Titus 2:9: Not argumentative. It is better to correct a mistake than to make excuses for it. And what should motivate a servant in his work is this encouraging promise. Colossians 3:24: Knowing that from the Lord you will receive the inheritance as your reward. You are serving the Lord Christ. If Christ Himself were asking you to do a piece of work, would you not do it gladly? While you serve your master, you are serving the Lord Christ. And if you ask what your pay will be — you will receive the inheritance.

Application 1: If relational holiness is the great mark of a godly man, then — God have mercy on us — how few genuinely godly people can be found. Many wear the coat of religious profession. They will pray and talk about points of doctrine. But what does their life at home reveal? They are not good in their relationships. How badly it reflects when Christians are deficient in the godliness that should show up in their roles. Can we call him godly who is a corrupt magistrate? He twists justice. Psalm 58:1: Do you indeed decree what is right, O rulers? Do you judge the children of man uprightly? No, in your hearts you devise wrongs. Can we call him godly who is a negligent parent? He never teaches his child the way to heaven. He is like the ostrich, which is cruel to its young, as Job 39:16 says. Can we call him godly who is a poor head of household? Many masters leave their religion at church — the way a clerk leaves his book — and bring nothing of God home. Their houses are not houses of God but houses of wickedness — not little temples but little hells. How many masters will stand at the judgment bar, having fed their servants' stomachs but starved their souls. Can we call him godly who is a bad child? He stops his ear to his parents' counsel. You might as well call someone a loyal subject who rebels against his ruler. Can we call him godly who is a lazy and willful servant? He is quicker to find fault in others than to correct it in himself. To call someone godly who is poor in his relationships is a contradiction — it is calling evil good, as Isaiah 5:20 warns.

Application 2: If we want God's approval, let us show our godliness in our relationships. Failing to be good in our relationships cancels the good of everything else. Naaman was a great and honorable man — but he was a leper, as 2 Kings 5:1 says. That one word 'but' spoiled everything. In the same way, a person may be a great listener to sermons — but he neglects his relational duties. That failure stains the beauty of all his other actions. As in printing, even if the type is perfectly cut, if it is set in the wrong place the whole page is ruined. In the same way, no matter how many admirable qualities a person has, if he is not faithful in his particular role and makes no conscience of how he walks in his relationships, he does harm to religion. There are many to whom Christ will say at the last day, as He said to the rich young man in Luke 18:22: You still lack one thing — you failed in your relational calling. Therefore, as we value our salvation and the honor of religion, let us shine in the sphere of relationship where God has placed us.