Direction 10

The tenth and last direction is that having done all this, you would not rest in ease but in healing — not in ease of conscience but in healing of conscience. I ground this upon Isaiah 57:17-18. What was the true issue of that man's trouble there, whom God contended with? It was healing and guiding: 'I will guide him, and I will heal him.'

You who are troubled in mind — think not your estate to be good simply because you begin to cease being troubled, but only when the issue of your trouble is healing of your spirits by some sound ground of comfort, and when guidance in God's ways and more close walking with God is the issue of it. For God may slack the cords and take you off the rack when yet he has not pardoned you. A traitor who was cast into the dungeon and had many irons on him may be let out of the dungeon, have his irons taken off, have the liberty of the Tower, and walk abroad again with his keeper — and yet not have his pardon. Indeed, usually before execution they take off the irons and allow more freedom. Thus it is with many. 'I thank God,' says one, 'I have had much trouble of mind, distress of conscience — such and such sins terrified me and I could not sleep for them. But now I am well again and they do not trouble me.' Yes, but is this all? You have cause to fear that your irons are merely taken off in advance of execution. It is with men in the point of trouble of mind in the guilt of sin as in the power of it — in justification as in sanctification. A man who has had a strong lust stirring in him, if he has gone a year or two and finds it not stirring, therefore thinks he is utterly freed from it — which yet may be but a restraint of it, not the killing of it; a cessation, not mortification. So it is often with this trouble of mind arising from the guilt of sin: because a man finds not those doubts and fears and terrors in his heart that he was accustomed to, he presently thinks all is well — when it may be merely a truce, not a peace; a laying down of arms for a time only, to make greater preparation against the soul afterward; a reprieve and a little enlargement in prison, not a pardon.

That you may further understand the meaning of this: in one who is God's child and in a wicked man (though both may be and are troubled in mind and conscience), there is a main difference both in the chief cause of their trouble and in the issue and removal of it. A wicked man's trouble is for the anguish and present pain he feels in sin, and in God's wrath lashing his conscience, and out of fears that his sin will not be pardoned — that he shall endure these tortures forever in hell. So it was with Judas, Cain, and many others. But a godly man's trouble — though it has often all this in it — has at its chief a further thing. It is not only the sting and smart of sin, but also the filth, the foulness, the offense done to God that wounds him. For he has a heart after God's heart, and therefore looks on sin with the same kind of eye that God does. And as God accounts the offense done to him the greatest evil in sin, so does a godly heart also. It is not the sting of this serpent only, but the poison of it that disquiets him. Neither is it only the lack of pardon of sin and the fear of God's everlasting wrath that mainly troubles him, but the want of God's favor, the parting with him whom he sees so excellent and glorious — the want of seeing his face. His desire is to live in God's sight and to have God be his God. Now such as the wound is, such also is the remedy. Therefore the wicked man, being troubled only with the sting and smart of sin — pull that sting out, take that load off, and he is well enough, as cheerful and pleasant as ever. It being present ease he seeks, he confesses his sin and does anything for the present to come out of it — as Pharaoh said, 'Take away this death only' (Exodus 10:17). Or at the utmost, his aim is but pardon of sin and peace with God, that he may be freed from the fears of undergoing forever that of which he now feels the earnest in his conscience. Hence the remedies they often resort to are suitable — they are but like rattles to still children with. They run to merry company and music, as Cain fell to building cities, and so they put off the terrors of their consciences. It is ease they seek and no more. Or they run to a formal performance of duties, as poor souls under popery when stung by the friars' sermons were set penances and good works to be done, which stilled them for a while, and for these they thought they should have pardon. So men run now to holy duties, but with the same opinion as they did then — as bribes for a pardon: 'What shall I give,' says he in Micah 6:7, 'for the sin of my soul?'

But now the wound of God's child being deeper — not the sting of sin only but the poison of it; not the smart but the offense done to God; not the fear of his wrath but the want of his favor — accordingly, ease from those terrors does not satisfy him. No, not simply peace with God will content him, or a pardon. He says not only, 'O wretched man that I am, who shall deliver me from this death?' but, 'Who shall deliver me from this body of death?' If news were brought him that God would pardon him and not call him to reckoning for any sin, and nothing more were spoken to his conscience, he would still be troubled until he had assurance of God's good will also. If it were said, 'God will indeed pardon you, but he will never love you as he did; he will not look on you; you must not come into his sight' — this would grieve the soul more than the other would content it, and he would be troubled without end. I may allude to what Absalom said in addressing his father when he had been banished from him, to express the true desire and greatest trouble of a soul in this case (2 Samuel 14:32). Absalom was pardoned the offense, but it did not content him. 'Let me see his face, or let him kill me.' So it is with a poor soul: ease, pardon, knocking off his bolts do not content him until he enjoys communion with God, until he sees his face in his ordinances. Psalm 24:6: 'This is the generation of them that seek him, that seek your face' — this is the mark, the disposition of that generation. You may see this in David when his conscience was wounded for that great sin. What troubled him? Not the want of pardon of sin, for the prophet told him God had pardoned him. Not the mere stings of conscience and ache of his broken bones. But 'against you, against you, have I sinned' — so that ease could not satisfy him. Further, in verse 10: 'Create in me a clean heart' — for having chewed the cud of that unclean act, it had left a stain in his imagination. 'And renew a right spirit within me; oh give me grace and truth of heart toward you, and oh let me live in your presence and see you and have acquaintance with you' (verse 11). The want of this was what troubled him, and until he had obtained it he could never be at rest. For he sought not ease or pardon only, but healing of his conscience by the favor of God and his love shed abroad. So take heed of resting in ease. Are you now in darkness, full of terrors and God's wrath? You will not rest until that darkness is dispelled by the arising of the light of the Sun of Righteousness upon you, and the revealing of God's face in the face of Jesus Christ. Until his righteousness is conveyed to your hearts by some of his wings — some promise, some ordinance of his. For the wound being the unrighteousness of sin, nothing but Christ's righteousness will heal it. The wound being the want of God's favor and the evidence of his being your God, the want of his face and good will — nothing but the revealing and arising of this in your hearts will heal you. Look at what the wound is: such is the plaster. And indeed this alone heals, for though by other means the sore may be skinned over and ease gotten, yet it will break out again. So in Isaiah 57:17-18: 'I will heal him' — and how? By restoring comforts to him. 'Restore to me the joy of your salvation,' says David, 'that the bones you have broken may rejoice.' And how does he heal him? 'I create the fruit of the lips, peace' — he does it by some promise or other. If the want of the sense of communion with God and absence from him disquiets a man, then the heart rests not until it has found its Beloved (Song of Solomon 3:1-5). If doubts that no grace is in the heart — then the heart rests not until some grace in truth is evidenced and some promise made to some grace is brought home. Still, look at what the trouble is — such also must the plaster be, and then it is healing. Were you ever in the dungeon? What was it that freed you? Was it Christ's righteousness laid hold on, God's face revealed, your own grace with some promise brought home to your heart — that came with a commission to deliver you? Then it is right. Otherwise your bolts may be knocked off, and this only in advance of your execution.

The tenth and final direction is this: having done all these things, do not be satisfied with mere ease but with healing — not ease of conscience but healing of conscience. I ground this on Isaiah 57:17-18. What was the true outcome of the trouble endured by the man God contended with there? It was healing and guidance: 'I will guide him, and I will heal him.'

Those of you who are troubled in mind — do not think your condition is good simply because you have begun to stop being troubled. It is only good when the outcome of your trouble is the healing of your spirit on some genuine ground of comfort, and when the result is guidance into God's ways and a closer walk with Him. For God may loosen the cords and take you off the rack without yet having pardoned you. A traitor thrown in the dungeon with many chains on him may be let out of the dungeon, have his chains removed, have the freedom of the Tower, and walk about with his keeper — and still not have his pardon. In fact, they usually take off the irons and allow more freedom before execution. This is the situation for many. 'I thank God,' one person says, 'I went through much distress of mind and conscience — such and such sins terrified me and I could not sleep for them. But now I am well again and they no longer trouble me.' Yes, but is that all? You have cause to fear that your irons have merely been taken off in preparation for execution. Troubles of mind regarding the guilt of sin work the same way as sin's power over us — in justification as in sanctification. A person who has had a strong lust stirring within him, if he goes a year or two and finds it no longer stirring, thinks he is completely free from it — when in fact it may only be restrained, not killed; a pause, not mortification. So it is often with this distress of mind arising from the guilt of sin: because a person no longer feels the doubts and fears and terrors he was accustomed to, he immediately concludes all is well — when it may be merely a truce, not a peace; a temporary laying down of arms to build greater force against the soul later; a reprieve and a brief relaxation in prison, not a pardon.

To help you understand this better: between a person who is God's child and a wicked person — though both may be, and are, troubled in mind and conscience — there is a fundamental difference both in the chief source of their trouble and in how it is resolved and removed. A wicked person's trouble comes from the anguish and present pain he feels in sin, from God's wrath lashing his conscience, and from fear that his sin will not be pardoned — that he will endure this torment forever in hell. So it was with Judas, Cain, and many others. But a godly person's trouble — though it often contains all of these — has at its center something further. It is not only the sting and smart of sin, but also its filth, its ugliness, the offense done to God that wounds him. For he has a heart that beats like God's heart, and therefore he looks at sin with the same kind of eyes God uses. And just as God considers the offense against Himself to be the greatest evil in sin, so does a godly heart. It is not just the sting of the serpent but the poison that troubles him. Nor is it only the lack of pardon and the fear of God's eternal wrath that mainly troubles him — it is the loss of God's favor, the separation from One whom he sees as so excellent and glorious, the inability to see His face. His desire is to live in God's presence and to have God be his God. As the wound is, so is the remedy needed. Therefore the wicked person, being troubled only by the sting and smart of sin — once you pull out the sting, remove the load, he is perfectly fine again, as cheerful and easy as ever. Seeking only present ease, he confesses his sin and does whatever is necessary at the moment to get out from under it — as Pharaoh said, 'Remove this death from me' (Exodus 10:17). Or at most, his goal is only pardon from sin and peace with God — to be freed from the fear of enduring forever what his conscience is now tasting. So the remedies wicked people reach for match this: they are like noisemakers used to quiet fretful children. They run to cheerful company and music, as Cain built cities, and in this way they push away the terrors of their consciences. Ease is all they are looking for. Or they run to a formal performance of religious duties — as poor souls under the papacy, when stricken by the friars' sermons, were assigned penances and good works, which calmed them for a while, and for which they thought they deserved pardon. People do the same today, turning to religious duties with the same mindset as a bribe for pardon: 'What shall I give,' as Micah 6:7 says, 'for the sin of my soul?'

But the wound of God's child goes deeper — it is not the sting of sin only but its poison; not the pain but the offense done to God; not the fear of His wrath but the absence of His favor. So ease from those terrors does not satisfy him. It is not enough even to simply be at peace with God or to receive pardon. He does not say only, 'O wretched man that I am, who will rescue me from this death?' but 'who will rescue me from this body of death?' If he were simply told that God would pardon him and not hold him accountable for any sin, with nothing more said to his conscience, he would still be troubled until he had assurance of God's goodwill as well. If someone said to him, 'God will pardon you, but He will never love you as He did; He will not look at you; you must not come into His presence' — this would grieve the soul more than the pardon would comfort it, and he would be in distress without end. I may borrow what Absalom said when he addressed his father after being banished from him, as a picture of the true longing and deepest trouble of a soul in this condition (2 Samuel 14:32). Absalom had been forgiven the offense, but it did not satisfy him. 'Let me see his face — or let him kill me.' So it is with a poor soul: ease, pardon, the removal of chains — none of these content him until he enjoys communion with God and sees His face in His ordinances. Psalm 24:6: 'This is the generation of those who seek Him, who seek Your face' — this is the defining mark, the disposition of that generation. You can see this in David when his conscience was wounded for that great sin. What was troubling him? Not the absence of pardon — the prophet had already told him God had pardoned him. Not merely the stings of conscience and the ache of broken bones. But 'against You, against You, have I sinned' — so that ease alone could not satisfy him. And further, in verse 10: 'Create in me a clean heart' — for having dwelt on that unclean act, it had left a stain in his imagination. 'And renew a right spirit within me; oh give me grace and sincerity of heart toward You, and let me live in Your presence and see You and have fellowship with You' (verse 11). The absence of this was what troubled him, and he could find no rest until he had obtained it. For he was not seeking ease or pardon only, but the healing of his conscience through God's favor and the experience of His love. So take care not to rest in mere ease. Are you now in darkness, filled with terror and God's wrath? You will not rest until that darkness is dispelled by the rising of the Sun of Righteousness and the revealing of God's face in the face of Jesus Christ. Until His righteousness is conveyed to your heart through some one of His wings — some promise, some ordinance of His. For since the wound is the unrighteousness of sin, nothing but Christ's righteousness will heal it. And since the wound is also the absence of God's favor — the lack of His face and goodwill, the sense of not knowing Him as your God — nothing but the revealing and dawning of this in your heart will heal you. See what the wound is, and the remedy must match it. This alone truly heals — for though by other means the wound may be covered over and ease obtained, it will break out again. So in Isaiah 57:17-18: 'I will heal him' — and how? By restoring comforts to him. 'Restore to me the joy of Your salvation,' says David, 'that the bones You have broken may rejoice.' And how does He heal him? 'I create the fruit of the lips, peace' — He does it through some promise or other. If what troubles you is the sense of missing God's presence and being separated from Him, the heart finds no rest until it has found its beloved (Song of Solomon 3:1-5). If the trouble is doubting whether any grace is in the heart — the heart finds no rest until some genuine grace is evidenced and some promise connected to it is brought home. Always: see what the trouble is — the remedy must match it, and then it heals. Have you ever been in the dungeon? What was it that set you free? Was it Christ's righteousness taken hold of — God's face revealed — your own grace confirmed with some promise brought home to your heart, arriving with a commission to deliver you? Then that is the right remedy. Otherwise your chains may simply be removed — only in advance of your execution.